​The Square Peg and the Round Hole 

I am a Christian. I love God. I really do, believe me when I say I love Him.

Nevertheless, I am in this world, full of sin. A world that is always pressing,  pushing and pulling me to fit in and in my haste, I fall and I make mistakes, a lot of them. I am in this world trying to understand myself, find myself and make my mark… its called life.

So, how do I become a strong, faithful, God fearing, spirit filled, tongue-speaking believer when I am usually tripping?

It is so hard putting up the Christ-like attitude and living for God, for then my collegues call me “Colo”

Then I say to myself, “How about I try fitting in, dress like they do, talk like they do, think like them, behave like them” but I get  frustrated because that is not me… I am not of the world. In addition, the guilt that comes afterwards is too high a price to pay.

So, I consider being lukewarm… after all, I’m only human. I can take the alchohol but I will not get drunk. I will kiss and caress that girl but I will not penetrate. That is not fornication, is it? Then my friends wouldn’t think me colloquial anymore. However, He says He will spit me out and I won’t be worthy of the kingdom.

Alright then, what are my options? How do I cope in this perverse world? Then He demonstrates to me; He picks a square peg and tries to push it in a round hole. After so many futile efforts, He stops and picks a knife, and then He begins to reshape the peg to make it round. We go back to the round hole and I think to myself, this time it will fit. But surprisingly the round hole has changed to be a square hole. I realized then, what a waste of time it has been.

Then He says to me, “My child just like the peg and the hole, you as well cannot fit. For you’re not of this world and everything in it keeps changing constantly. My grace is always sufficient for you to live in this round world. Do not live to please men, always live with the conciousness that I love you no matter what you do. You are my child and I am your Father.”

So I stopped being concious of sin and set my eyes on Him. Like a baby learning to walk, my first few steps aren’t perfect, but sigh with the hope that the Lord orders them.

Knowing His grace abounds and looking solely to Him makes me a believing Christian.

Keeping up appearances as a Christian isn’t the way to go, dear, counting on Him at all times and in everything will, however, bring you an inch closer to being found by God’s grace. 

Blessings! 

Gracemary Hagan 📝
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